......................

I wonder how long till this makes me blow up or leave. I really don't want either.

138

Heartbreak is sad but never loving someone is way sadder.

☻Random☺

Smileys are fun.

When I put ☺♥☻ Together is represents me and mah baybee. I wanted to randomly share that.

137##################

I am determined for us to spend one day without ness just talking and hanging!!!!!! (but we can make out of course)

uno3six

I kept rereading this one page in your rhyme book and it has inspired me to fill up six pages in my book. O_O I haven't written longhand in a while.

1...............3...................5

When I first met my little sister I was like, I don't know about this. When I stopped to get to know here a realized how awesome she is. I love my little sister.

#134

Today, I was like, dear lord if I die today like it be right now in the moment of pure body joydom ♥

Ways to Pass time: #13♥

Look up superstitions.

Twentyeleven so far

SO far this year has been great. I wish I could describe the quite contentedness I have felt these first 31 days. I have been blessed with a wonderful boyfriend. A great extended family, new people in my life to create lasting friendships with. A new chance with vibe, I even auditioned for something outside of vibe for once. I am loving 2011 and I know only more wonderful, great, empowering thing are yet to come. ♥

Tip for a relationship #18

Always keep your partner on their toes. Don't be afaird to shock them.

Dreams of us: #7

I am standing behind a tree, breathing hard, shirt soak through and sticking to my body. I hear and twig crack and I cover my mouth with my hand, to stifle a giggle. I lean quietly to peak and I see you facing the other way, I point my water gun at you and bam, soaked back you turn and return fire. I am giggling and shooting you back, our clothes soaked through, thank god it was a scorcher outside. I feel the Sun blazing on my skin making the once cold shirt warm. I run to you and tackle you to the ground, a rare moment when you are caught off guard and actually fall. Maybe you just do it to amuse me. We are laughing so hard we are in tears and we roll onto the grass, not caring if it stains our shirts. I propped up and give you a quick kiss. I ask who won, but neither of us kept score so we shrugged and let the sun dry us before going in the house for lunch.

#133

I am in pain....but it was worth it :)

132

Lately, i have been getting scared of losing you, or him resurfacing.

Ways to pass time: #12

Read the newspaper.

131

Degrassi is super addicting and sometimes I can relate.

130

I miss you having a phone because now you seem to busy to talk to me.

129

My mom is currntly bitching about earrings >.> wow women...annoying much

128

I love spending time with my little sister

127

I seriously need a laptop

126

I really really want to make out right now.

Passion filled Kisses

Our lips meld against each other. The heat surging through my body is enough to flush my cheeks. Your hand is on the back of my head pushing me closer. My heart is pounding against my chest, you press my harder against the wall and I ignore whatever pain may come with that. I lean more into you, and some how we still haven't become one person. You pull away slightly and breath heavily and passionately. You look at me eyes filled with passion and I can see the desire brimming in them. For amount times stops and it is only us, you lean back in slowly, eyes never leaving mine. Then you lower them to my lips, lick your and bite my lip. Then we are at it again.

French

I am sure, someone has wonder about my obsession with french. Well its simple , I was first introduced to the language at eight. In a super fancy after school program, at first I hated the fact that I had to learn this language, that at the time that I thought I would never use. Then the teacher spoke, the rhythm of the word had my transfixed. She smiled and said soon would we all be fluent in the language. Her speaking it made her beautiful, I wanted nothing more then to speak the language that made this plain women seem beautiful to me. I became consumed by it, I was the top student. My parents were proud but upset because I had no urge for Spanish. I was to busy being in love with French. Then I was pulled from the program and I was forced to pressure Spanish. My heart was broken but I let it go. In high School, I met two French guys who spoke little English. The kind of cute one smiled and said I was beautiful in French and my heart flutter. He was suddenly sexy. I told him I would teach him English if he taught me French. I was immersed again, in the beauty of the words and how they sound. Then he went back to France, and I lost it again. But my love for it never died. That's why I love it because it was like poetry to my ears. When a man does it, it makes it a turn on ;]. Well, there you go.

125

I am listening to in the morning ......*sighs*

onetwofour

Time seems to be moving at human paces, it feels nice.

1,2,3

I wrote in my notebook today, I haven't done that in a while, it felt great.

122

Serisouly? A new power rangers >.> *sighs*

Hmmm

I wonder if you are thinking about me right now? (10:58 pm)

#121

I don't know how I feel about me not meeting you 'rents. *shrugs* I really didn't want to admit that.

When our eyes meet. (120)

When our eyes meet in an intense gaze my body heats up. I can feel my blood boil and my body yearn for your touch. For your hands to travel my body with an intense eagerness, that makes me want press closer against you. Your lips pressed against my mouth, makes me sigh with pleasure and the way you body feels pinning mines against a wall causing my heart to pound until it feels like it will burst in my chest. The way my arms wrap around your neck without me thinking makes me smile. I never want to break this kiss, never want to end this embrace because each time we do, I anticipate the next one.

Dreams of us: #6

I dream of winged people, but when I shake my back feathers fall off. You grab my hand as we stand on a cliff and I look at you, and you have wings to. You face is full of panic, I can see the worry in your eyes and I am afraid. I have never seen you worried before. "Hurry up." You tug on my arm as you jump, spreading you wings on the descent, I turn around demon are bearing grins as the run to try and catch me. I jump without thinking, wings spread like second nature soaring past you. You catch up, in the blink of an eye. "How did they find us?" I say over the wind that is wiping my hair back. You shrug, I know all that matters now is how we get rid of them. I spin downward to the trees, you don't question me, you follow, we are holding each other as we enter the trees. We land silently and I pull a sword from in between my shoulder blades. In glows a light blue hue, you smile, knowing that this means we will fight. You square you shoulder and grin like a madman with the opportunity to kill you captures. I kiss you, the kiss was so filled with passion I feared the trees would catch fire from the intensity of it. You pull back, the mix of desire and violence in your eyes makes me want to scar you body with my nails as our bodies climax in intense pleasure. I have to turn away before I let the lust for your body take over my mind. The hilt of my sword felt cool in my hands, the weight familiar and the power in my body,.exhilarating. I could feel my heart pound sweet adrenaline through my body. I pull my wings in to keep them from being marred. The first demon is on you before I have had the chance to notice, you pull his arm from his body, blood that looks like inks pulls from its body as it shrieks in pain. I smile momentarily before turning and swinging my blade into the neck of an approaching abomination. I hear the crack of bone under my blade and give a wicked grin, I think to myself, who said angels can't have fun. We keep dealing death like a fresh hand of cards to losers at a poker game; with grin broad because we know that we will win. When the slaughter is over and our bodies are covered in the ink that is the enemy's blood, you grab me and kiss me deeply. You tear my already tore clothes away and throw onto the ground. Thrusting yourself into me like an animal with no control, the pain shooting throw my body and it hurts as much as it is pleasing me. I dig my nails deep into the flesh that line you spine. You wings wrapped as a cocoon, our cries of pleasure filling the air causing the birds to fly away. Our juices mixing with the blood of the freshly dead as we climax. We smile and look into each others eyes, I love you were exchanged, then we sleep the sleep of warriors but we dream the dreams of lovers. ♥

Tip for a relationship #17

Always be honest, lies making things worse & 99.9% of the time, you get caught.

Ways to Pass time #11

Make lists :D

-__- 119

I hard to find ways to make this number tittle thing interesting.

118

I still read your blogs............

__........__117

I like my blogs better when I add a picture.

116 :)

I didn't think I would write these may at the moment thought things/ confessions.

115

Every blog, no matter how pointless, I write with you in mind. ♥

114

I think RayWillamJohnson is a genius. Equals3 FTW.

Alice is A Gemini ♥

ARIES (Jasmine) willful, feisty, independent

TAURUS (Belle) creative, loyal, dependable

GEMINI (Alice) curious, childlike, talkative

CANCER (Cinderella) cautious, nurturing, empathetic

LEO (Charlotte) provocative, demanding, flamboyant

VIRGO (Tiana) realistic, knowledgeable, modest

LIBRA (Mulan) intellectual, easygoing, indecisive

SCORPIO (Pocahontas) intense, secretive, passionate

SAGITTARIUS (Rapunzel) adventurous, spirited, happy

CAPRICORN (Aurora) respectful, devoted, classy

AQUARIUS (Ariel) idealistic, rebellious, open minded

Things That makes me think of you

1. Silly theories
   


2. "I am like a falling star who has finally found her place next to another in a lovely constellation, where we will sparkle in the heavens forever.” ♥
   


3. Bruno Mars ♥


4. Lion king


5. Stars ♥


6. Full moons


7. Cheesy Loves songs


8. Teddy Bears


9. Strawberry Milk


10. The color blue

And Billions of other things ♥

1-1-3

Some of the sweetest moments are when my brother is being nice to me and comforting me. ♥

112

I JUST REALIZED THAT IF YOU COME OVER Tomorrow, you will meet the rest of my family. Now I really do hope you come.

oneoneone

If I call you a name, or hit you, then I love you more then you know.

#110

I had the strange urge to yell at my boyfriend because I was thinking "he better not be late to kingdom hall!" when did I start caring about that kind of stuff ? O.O I am starting to scare myself. First, I am reading watchtower, and enjoying it, now I am caring about religious obligations..... only god knows whats next.

Onehundred&nine

I am looking at wedding dresses and thinking of you. It makes me both, sad and happy. Hmmm. But you know why.

10Eight ♥

I had a dream, you gave me this ring, only the stones around the ring was colorful. I fell in love with the ring but what was more important was the person who gave it to me.

one07

I was reminded why Flash is a great superhero ;]

All For you ♥

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tTJI9zdYDh0 (blogger takes to long to put up videos ♥)

I smile at the thought of you, because I know that you are worth the thoughts. You are amazing. I don't get how it took me so long to notice you. I do think its funny, (lol) because I can't help but wonder, how many other guys have I lived my life without noticing? Every time I look at you and you hug me, I get that "man I belong in these arms feeling." I have never got that feeling from simply being in some one's arms. I feel safe and comfortable and happy. If I am going to be bluntly honest, I never thought I would dreaming of forever with a dark skin guy, I am not racist, I am just typically attracted light skin (Spanish) men. But love knows no colors. Not that I really knew that before you. See I thought love would find a man that would fit my typically "type". I never imagined being with someone who was literally invisible to me for like a year and a half before. I think that makes this connection with you that much more significant. I am glad that I finally noticed you, that you are my love. I have enjoyed every second with you. ♥ I love you greatly.

You my dear are flawless in your imperfections 10/20 <3

Tips for a relationship: #16

Body language speaks volumes and if you pay attention it affects how a conversation. Crossing your arms, legs, hand in pockets, all make it seem like you are closed at not listening. When speaking with a partner, sit or stand open body. It will change how the conservation goes.

1oh6

To think once upon a time I loved you. My heart skipped beats for you, my stomach did flip flops for you. All wile your eyes were glued to the girl with the golden hair. To think that I though there would be no one in the world for me but you. To think that despite the fact that you love her, I still let myself dream of you. Now, now I see my hand clasped to his and I let you fade. You will always be someone special to me, always. But he, he will get all the love I had for you and more because he is worthy and he, now his is truly perfect for me.

The moo-sick hasn't stopped flowing, I just love another genre.

#1..........0................five

Looking at you , sparks up my passion.

#104

STRANGE THINGS FASCINATE ME.

Llamazzz

"You are the tap to my salad fingers."

O.O

"I am a terriosts of love." -Ralph

Wtf?!?!?!?!?

#103

*sighs* Why can't I stay mad at you? Its been like 30 seconds since the last post and I am already not mad at you anymore.

Things I need to write. (#102)

Sometimes I wish you would put some kind of effort that would make it seem like you care when I am upset. Just a little, I just want someone to be there for me, and you don't get it. You don't get that I need someone to vent to. You just shut me down. How can you say you a foul weather friend if when my skies get cloudy and I want to just scream you won't hold my hand while I do it. Damn, in these moments I feel so fucking alone. Its sad that I can't even tell you because all you want to say to me is "man up" of "hit me up when you are done being miserable." Yeah because that makes me feel great. It may not seem important to YOU but it is to me. I am not sorry for wanting to vent so I can let it go but like always at least I know the blank pages of a book on the empty on a blog is here for me. My paper never turns me away, always embraces me. Its whatever, just venting on my blog, it what I do a lot lately. Maybe I should censor myself more? Nah what for, only Bency reads this anyway. *shurgs*

1/27/04

It was snowy day like this on, when you came into my world. A beautiful baby boy who was already fighting to stay alive. You won, and I couldn't be happier. You full cheeks and toothless smile always lifted my spirits. As I watch you grow, I can't help but feel my heart swell with love. I feel the need to protect you. You are the light of my life, I love you my baby boy, happy birthday. Seven years of brilliance, of holding your hand, of hearing you life f holding you while you cry. As long as I have breath in my body, and light in my eyes, I will live to be by your side. You will always be the number one little man in my life.

Dreams of us: #5

I grab you hand, laughter ringing behind us, I place my finger on my lips as we sneak away from the reception. We get outside and you smile at me. I haven't stopped smiling, the sun is setting and you pull me close to you as a slight chill fills the air. "Its going to be a beautiful summer night." You say in a husky whisper. I gaze into your eyes, a mix of desire and love fill them. "How does it fell, to be Mrs. Pierre?" You say, pulling me even closer. I lean my head against your chest and sigh happily, "Perfect." You kiss my forehead and I look up into your eyes, "Perfect." You echo. Then we kiss while the sky sets fire as the sun disappears.

Ways to pass the time: #10

Sing and Dance across your house.

Diesases that infest this world

• Homophobia
• Ignorance
• Stupidity
• Sexism
• Ageism
• Racism
• Promiscuity
• Hate
• Religious intolerance

Top Ten Disney Movies

1. Aristocats


2. Fox and the Hound


3. Lady and the Tramp


4. Lion King


5. Snow white


6. Oliver and Company


7. All dogs go to heaven


8. Pinocchio

9. Mulan

10. Tarzan

I love all of them...this was hard to do D:

101

Already planning my trip to Florida and wishing I could take you with.

1.O.O

I am afraid to ask you about your life because:

1. I don't want you to shut down


2. I am afraid of the answers I might get


3. I am still hoping you will share on your own

#99

IT peeves me when I ask someone how are they, or what are you doing and they don't ask it back. >.<

#98

I get jealous that my boyfriend seems to show facebook affection to everyone but me.

Ways to pass the time: #9

Take pictures

12345678(9)8(7)654321

I wasn't incomplete without you, just lost and now I am found. lol that makes you sound like Jesus, lmao well you did save me just in a different way. What I mean is I was lost and now I found my way back to myself.

(90)+(6)= 96 :O

I Ialways wonder why the said be as quite as a mouse when if you listen you can hear mice. So How quite is that really?

N.i.n.e.t.y F.I.V.E

Blogging makes me feel better.

Ways to pass the time: #8

Break out into a random skit with anyone who is around.

le numéro 94

This school ish is bothering me more and more each day.

Tips for a relationship: #15

Allow yourself to really feel every emotion, then if that emotion is negative for you, get off it. Give you self an angry, depressed, frustrated all that bad junk deadline, where you just feel it. When you learn how to keep the negative feelings out, you can communicate better with your partner.

Numero 93

I talk my friend off a ledge today, so to speak, and all I keep thinking is what if you walk back to the ledge when my back is turned.

Hollow Thuds

I watch you walk away and I feel this sad feeling. I don't want to see you go, I just want us to be together longer. I feel this way when I saw you but we didn't really spend time together. IT hurts, pulls at my heart strings and plays sad songs. Mah baybee. My thoughts are filled with you at school while I am at home, alone without you. You will be busy, and me, I be finding ways to keep my thoughts from painfully lingering on your absence. I hate it. They seconds I am without you feel less amazing then they could be, even when they are filled with joy. To make a moment perfect I have to feel you near, I am already missing you as soon as your fingers slip out from in between mine. My hand feels empty. Sometimes I can't look back to watch you leaving because it hurts that much more. Maybe its silly but its how I feel anyway. I feel myself smile sad smiles when we kiss, and say I love you right before you part. I mean, I know I will see you again but it never makes this moment suck any less. Especially on days like today, where all I wanted to do was sit down and talk to you. One on one, no body but me and you. Just sitting and talking, laughing and the occasional kiss. I don't know, all I know is that when you leave, I feel like there is the sound of hollow thuds ringing in my ears each step you take away from me.

Number 92

I don't want to be famous because I have seen E and the thought of people knowing that much about me freaks me out.

Dreams of us #4

We are walking as the fluffy white snowflakes get caught in my hair. You hand feels frozen against mine and my cheeks are red from the wind. You try to throw me in the snow but since I won't let get we both fall in. We laugh, and I throw snow in your face. You scowl at me but I ignore you. I lean forward and kiss you, and I am amazed at how even though its cold, your lips still feel warm against mine. You pick us up and then throw a snowball at me and run. I chase for like five seconds before I stop, then I slip and bust my ass and you laugh. Now I am scowling at you and throwing snow into your face. You are looking away laughing, and I start laughing too. Nothing says I love you like playing in the snow.

#91

I had a nightmare last night, I can't remember details all I know is that your were no where to be seen and I could barley stop from screaming.

#90

I am so glad that I remembered how much I adore people. I have been talking to people a lot these past few days and I keep getting happier and happier each time. It feels good to connect and just be with people. & it is always interesting lol especially with the group I find myself caught up in.

Ways to pass the time: #7

Daydream ♥ Let all your dreams come true in that sweet moment

Tips for a relationship: #14

Don't be afaird to try new things.

#89

You belief in me, sparked a belief in myself.

#88

I just had a light bulb moment. I resent religion because I am a pastor's daughter. When will I be okay with that and still be me?

#87

When My dad is around.......I walk on eggshells

Acting

Now a days, just the word terrifies me. I don't know why. I mean I am not bad. I actually good, I even think I act better then I write, which says a lot but I am still scared at the thought. Just try out, they tell me, who could it hurt. No one really, I am just to scared to even try. Not even scared they will say no, at this point i don't care. I just wish I had enough courage to show up and audition -__-. I don't know how I even talked myself into auditioning for our lady. I mean I wasn't scared I was just like lets do this *shrugs*. I had the at least I know I tried attitude. Now, it like *bites lip* you want me to try. Um mm I don't know about that, I mean and out pours the excuses, I have got millions. I am sure I can think of really valid and convincing ones too. Damn it, how the hell did I get this way??? I mean seriously I used to crave the stage, now I am to scared to taste the spotlight on my face. How I miss its intense heat, the opening night butterflies, the feel of success when the coward cheers and its all over. The bittersweet feeling of the last show. Damn it, I am getting all jittery again, what happened to my love for my art? What happened to my breathtaking commitment to it? Fuck. I just don't get how I created this fear, I am mean I know acting is tough but it is something I have always had in me. From a young age, and from time to time, I act alone in my room, laying the roles of everyone and bowing at the mirror. But don't tell me to do it for real because I freeze up. When did I stop letting it just be for fun? Isn't that why I wanted it as a career? So I could do something fun that I loved? Did I stop loving it? No of course not, even I feel my owe awe when I watch a play. I stayed amazed at the beauty of it all. I stay craving it. What is stopping me? Myself. Damn. Fuck it. I am doing this, I can do this. What have I got to lose? Jack shit. Awesome :D

#86

I daydream everyday about living with you ♥

#85

Sports make me crazy!! lol

*sighs* This is sad in its truth

(like you do now)
then I would tell my friends to lets ditch you

2:13pm
mhmm. but i'd still get ur name
and find u eventually

2:13pm
I would tell you red
I never give my real name

2:13pm
regardless u'd get mine
and i would search for hours the various spellings of red, redd, reddd

2:14pm
the seond one is right lol
second*
but you wouldn't find me
and I wouldn't be looking for you

2:15pm
well i wouldn't know that at the time

2:15pm
I know that

2:16pm
so. i'd still b on ur mind. so for all intents and purposes, u'd be bagged

2:17pm
who says you would be on my mind
you think my boy toy ouldn't wipe you from my memory just cause you had a debt with me
debate*

2:18pm
nah i'd respect ur "man"
but i do have memorable debates...
nd i'd give u some form of contact for future debates

2:19pm
(eww boy toy not man)

2:19pm
in quotes
cuz i wudn't kno he's ur boytoy either

2:20pm
and you think I would contact you?

2:21pm
u wud. maybe a hi every now and then
no serious conversation

2:22pm
lets say I didn't
and you saw mw again
alone
on a swing at a park

2:22pm
then that's even perfecter
its like a dream come true. and i'd tell u that
that swingsets help me think

2:23pm
I would say me 2

2:24pm
what a coincidence
what do u like to think about?

2:25pm
I would roll my eyes and say liek you care
like*

2:26pm
nd i'd say, ur rite, i don't care.
but i'm sure if u told me, i would start to.
and smile :)
nd thn say: i come here to think about good times in my life

2:27pm
I would say, so?

2:28pm
nd thn i wud laugh
nd say well at least ur honest. u dnt find that everywhere

2:29pm
I would probaly get up and say I don't have tie for your games
(i didn't trust men for shit)
time*

2:30pm
nd then i'd say ur rite... how bout we play a real game
see who can jump furthest off the swingset

2:31pm
I would tell you I don't jump off the swing set

2:31pm
y u chicken?

2:31pm
yes, scared of height

2:31pm
aww! well i used to do it to impress girls
wanna see?

2:31pm
no.
i don't want to be impressed

2:32pm
don't worry. it never worked. that's y i'm single
;)

2:33pm
No your single because you re probaly a jerk
who has broken more hearts then he is aware of
and doesn't care to learn about either

2:34pm
wow. have u been tlkin to my exes?
jk but i dunno bout all that. i do kno i try to make up for it by healin any broken ones i meet along the way
a for effort at least

2:35pm
I would tell you it doesn't matter
guys like you think you fix it'
but make it worse
because then the girl falls for you
and you don't share the feelings

2:36pm
guys like me? what do u know bout a guy likes me? i'm intrigued
*guy like me

2:36pm
Then I would turn away from you
and say foregt it
it doesn't matter anyway

2:36pm
i disagree. its hard to believe someone like u can say somethng that doesn't matter

2:37pm
I would look at you clearly upset and say
I bet you say that to everybody
just another girl to try to impress so you can go tell your boys you bagged another one

2:38pm
well, thats where ur wrong. nd look into ur eyes
u cud feel the honesty and truth burn into your soul and tell i'm not lying

2:39pm
I would look away
I don't believe you
you are just like the rest
here for a second
just long enough to fuck me up somemore then gone

2:40pm
actually... i've been here for about 5 mins. so i'm doin better than most

2:40pm
Look, the i would turn and look at you I really don't have time for your bullshit
what do you want from me anyway

2:41pm
i was just wondering if u cud push me on this swing

2:41pm
I would laugh a bitter laugh and say fuck you
and get off my swing and grab my stuff

2:42pm
actually... i'll pass. can u believe i dnt wanna have sex with u?

2:42pm
I am leaving.. and I would look at you one last time and shake my head
just like the rest of them
slick talk but in the end that is all it os

2:43pm
i'd smile. and say see u next time.
thanks for being honest with me. don't get that often

2:43pm
Okay where do I see yu next ?

2:44pm
its up to u. cuz if we meet up here, u gotta push me. u owe me

2:44pm
(this is not me asking I am just saying you are icking the next place since you brough it up)
(dumbss I already walked away you have to pick the next place we bump into each other)

2:45pm
i'd just be at that swingset. but those wud be my next word
s

2:46pm
So now you're stalking my swingset?

2:46pm
well... its mine first. i'm pretty sure im older

2:46pm
yeah but its across the street from my school
I am pretty sure you don't go there
why are you herer?
here*
?
okay fine ingore me w/e

2:51pm
u didnt get my last response?

2:51pm
no

2:52pm
"hm...
basically said that i'll follow u and stalk u till i get what i want
isn't that what every other guy does?
or maybe i'll follow u...
or i'll just keep swinging rite here. and hope that one day u come back, and insult me some more and finally push me

2:54pm
and I would say what is it that you want creep?
why do you want me to push you?
you are grown, just swing with your legs
but i would sit in the swing next to you

2:54pm
because nobody ever does. when was the last time somebody pushed u on the swingset?

2:55pm
I don't know. My friends do it sometimes to scare me

2:55pm
no i mean like really. lovingly
because they care?

2:56pm
I would look at you and mumble sorry then say never
just my mom I guess when i was younger
Then I would stare

2:56pm
i'd smile, look away, nd remember

2:56pm
who says i would push you lovingly?

2:57pm
i have faith... u seem to have plenty of love. but nobody who seems worth sharing it with

2:57pm
who says your worth it? i would bite my lip and look at me feet
Look I am sorry I just don't trust you
I don't want to be a bitch but I met a hundred guys like you
I don't even know why I am sitting here with you
then I would mumble somthing to myself and say
you nevr answered my question
after sighing deeply
or ingore me ...thats fine too

3:11pm
i understand.

3:11pm
how would you understand
?

3:12pm
i don't trust me either. so i guess we have that in common. nd definitely not art :p

3:12pm
Jerk

3:13pm
lol u got me.

3:13pm
I amleaving

3:13pm
sorry a.d.d. kicks in and i don't answer questions
u can leave. feel free. but i really wouldn't mind seein u again. or swingin next to u. if u'd like of course

3:14pm
You are clearly
some jerk who just says stupid shit

3:15pm
i accidently say smart things sometime

3:15pm
gee thats great
Look it was dumb of me to come here
I will just find a new place to clear my mind

3:16pm
cool!!
i'll see u there

3:17pm
NO
you won't
stop following me
you will only make this worse

3:17pm
i know
u'll prolly fall in love with me
and to make it worse, i'll prolly end up fallin for u
sux rite?

3:19pm
I would look at you with a brief smile then look at you angrily
I will not love you
then i would wlak away shakning my hed

3:19pm
i'd call out: u have urself a bet. when i win... u gotta push me on this swingset. by redd

3:20pm
I would turn a smile
I do like to gamble

3:21pm
i should warn u... i rarely ever lose.

3:21pm
funny neither do I
what do I get if I win?

3:22pm
hey, thn i'll leave u alone. nd u get to be right. about me being a jerk
girls love bein rite

3:22pm
I would laugh
I am already right about you being a Jerk
Cya around jerk

3:23pm
cya later!

3:23pm
OKay then you bumb into at a jays in downtown brooklyn, I am cutting class with my people
Bump*

3:25pm
i ignore u totally

3:25pm
One of my friend's remembers you from the art gallery and says hi

3:25pm
nd rite before u leave, i walk up and say "hey i was trying to be a jerk, but i'm bad at it."

3:26pm
I would look at you and say you did a pretty good job
I think you might be a pro

3:27pm
i learn fast

3:27pm
then I would say hey can I tell you a secret?

3:27pm
shoot

3:27pm
I would pull you to the back of the store and wishper in your ear
you are a jerk but I think I am okay with that
then i would laugh as I walked away

3:29pm
haha i wud have the dumbest look on my face

3:29pm
(lol why?)

3:29pm
cuz i wud kno u totally have the hots for me

3:29pm
anyway
then i bump into to you after not seeing you for two weeks at a store

3:31pm
wat kinda store?

3:31pm
ummm a music store
the kind that still sells records
in willamsberg
burg*

3:31pm
thn we fallin in love

3:31pm
lol
shush
just start the convo
My friend points you out to me and I give a flirty smile in you direction
then I laugh at something she says
Then I shout hey Jerk

3:33pm
i smile! hey loserrr

3:34pm
Iam not a loser

3:34pm
u will be by the end of this bet ;) what u lookin for? my cd isn't in that section

3:35pm
I roll my eyes and my friend laughs and leaves
What cd? I giggle
you got some cult cd about how tobe a jerk

3:35pm
just kiddin. i mean i do make music. but it'll never be here.

3:36pm
OH so the Jerk has a hobby besides stalking women

3:37pm
in my defense, i only stalk u

3:37pm
I smile

3:37pm
NOT that i'm stalkin u rite now
but i would if ihad ur fone number

3:37pm
Nice try Jerk
I am not giving you my number
Then I walk up to the record player and smile
I wish I was born in the 60s

3:39pm
i laugh it off nd say "clearly u were never black"

3:39pm
Then I would laugh back nope I guess I wasn't
Then i would push you against a wall and lean in real close and say I bet this is what you are used to
and what youexpect

3:41pm
i wud resist the impulse to kiss u and say
i expect nothing, so i get surprised more often
then pick u up and trade places. (preferably rite next to a james dean poster to feel like a badass)
nd say... now this is what i'm used to. but not this next part...
put u down and walk over to the beatles
section

3:42pm
I would laugh as I follow you'
you are a slut

3:43pm
no comment!

3:43pm
That was comment enough
Then I laugh
so the beatles huh?

3:44pm
mhmm. nothin like white ppl with soul.
now if i could be one of them... then i'd wanna b in the 60's too

3:45pm
I would laugh then stare at you
then I would sigh and walk away
I have to go Jerk, to much .............I just need air

3:47pm
well... nice seeing u again
stalk u lata ;)

3:47pm
then I would turn around and walk really close to your
our mouths would only be inches apart
then I would laugh and say I think I like you Jerk
Then I would walk out and meet up with my friend outside
anyway :) then I see you at a football game LOL that we both had tickets to and they happened to be located next to each other because life is funny that way

3:52pm
lol
who's playin?

3:52pm
smh you asking me like I am going to be paying attention

3:53pm
lol well i will
i'll give u my coat to stay warm, even tho u'll prolly b rootin for the other team
nd spend the rest of the time yelling and enjoyin it

3:54pm
which gives me the perfect change just to watch you

3:54pm
in my "natural habitat"

3:55pm
yeah
and tehhn when it over I would give you you're jacket and kiss your cheek and say maybe you aren't half bad
at least when your watching football
Lol then we will meet at a shakespere at the park play
by accident of course

3:59pm
lol
nd thn i watch u in ur natural habitat
(and pretend its not my own)

3:59pm
I would be tranifixed
(lol)
mouthing the words I know
I might even reach for your hand because i wouldn't be thinking straight and I would forget I am not supposed to like you

4:00pm
lol

4:01pm
lol well what would you do when I reach for your hand

4:02pm
hold on. that's a one in a million chance

4:02pm
Then I would turn and smile at you
and my guard would be down
my eyes would be sprinlking with the magic of theather
then i would say hey
in a soft voice
I think I might be losing this bet
then i would relize what I said
pull my hand back and say bye without a second galance
BUt I would have left you with my number that I slipped in your hand when i grabbed it

4:14pm
nd i wud die happy

4:14pm
lol no you wouldn't lol
when would you call

4:16pm
usually i'd say never call on the first nite
but ur clearly an exception

4:17pm
I wouldn't know you number so I would pick up and say who is this

4:17pm
ur favorite jerk who is totally gonna win this bet

4:17pm
I would laugh and say you ar emy only jerk
then i would sigh and say
you aren't mine in a low voice

4:18pm
i'd catch that nd say, it cud be worse

4:19pm
I would laugh and say how
?
how could it be worse Jerk?
I am losing this bet. which I hate and I like you/. which isn't something I wanted
so explain how it could be worse

4:28pm
i cud be falling for u too

4:28pm
Then I would suck my teeth
I have to go
I would hang up without saying anything else

4:28pm
who cares? u picked up

4:29pm
only b/c I didn't know tha number
Lol
anyway then i see you the next day at the swings

4:29pm
yesss!!!

4:29pm
but i don't notice you because i am crying
(come on loser say somthing)

4:32pm
oh well thn i come up and say hey...
u look like u need a push
nd smile

4:32pm
I look at you then look away and blush because i am embrassed
don't look at me
I barly manage to say

4:33pm
thn i blurt out, i can't help but look at u
thn blush also, thnkful because its dark
nd say i'm here to listen
even if u dnt wanna talk. i understand

4:34pm
I look at you shocked, why?
why can't you help but look at me?

4:34pm
nothin, its nothin

4:35pm
please tell me
just tell me this
I sniffle
then I will stop
please, please
I never ask anyone for anything
I just want to know

4:36pm
u seem... beautiful.
one day i'll tell u what that means. my definition is a little different

4:37pm
I would look at you and say so is mine
Then I would laugh and get up
I can't believe I am crying over you
then I would walk away
Then I would stop turn around walk up to you and kiss you
then i will pull away and say i was just curious to what that would fell like
feel*
then i would start walking away and say good bye jerk
it was nice knowing ya

4:40pm
i'd be too shocked to speak
nd thn say: does this mean i won?

4:42pm
I would look at you and say I am not sure then tears would run down my face

4:43pm
well then u can't leave without pushin me

4:44pm
I would walk away anyway and turn briefly and say I ama sore loser
Then I would smile a sad smile and says congrats
you got what you wanted
another broken girl to make you feel better abour yourself
you really are a jerk

4:47pm
um... who said u have to stay broken. i'd love to try to fix urs if u'd let me
u can use mine in the meantime

4:48pm
I don't want someone to fix me
i want someone to love me
then i will strom off
storm*

4:48pm
i think i already do
don't u see that?

4:49pm
i wouldn't turn around and iwould laugh my bitter alugh
no
no I don't

4:49pm
well i would. if u let me

4:50pm
let you what?

4:50pm
love you

4:50pm
you love me
no
you are a jerk
you loveyourself
you don't even know me
this is stupid
I don't even know you
I am such aan idoit

4:51pm
thats funny cuz u don't kno mr riyhrt

4:51pm
I don't believe in mr.right

4:52pm
me either ;)

4:52pm
just mister wrong dressed up as mister right

4:52pm
well i believe in u
being different from any one else i kno

4:53pm
We can't do this anymore, you
you can never love me

4:53pm
i guess not
cuz u'd never give me a chance

4:54pm
why would you wanta chance? I am fucked up

4:54pm
but it was nice swingin wit ya
who isn't?

4:54pm
why would you want me?
I am not pretty
I am not the smartest person you will meet
I can't focus most of the time
I am scared of everything
I would be moving closer to you why I saythis
when i care about someone ths littlest thing they say would hurt me

4:56pm
nd i love you

4:56pm
and I don't want you to be able to hurt me
what?

4:57pm
i love you

4:58pm
I would be frozen in my place
You love me? I would look srsly confused

4:59pm
besides, i already have ur heart
possession is 9/10ths of the law

5:00pm
Iwould still being staring at you
I.......I......no....... you....
you don't know if you have myheart
then I take to step closer
two*

5:02pm
mhmm

5:03pm
what makes you think you have my heart?
I take two more steps closer

5:03pm
i said that? takes a step closer

5:03pm
yes, steps closer again
yes you did

5:04pm
oh.. steps closer

5:04pm
aren't you going to tell me why you think that? steps closer

5:04pm
because of this
goes in for the movie kiss!!

5:05pm
Pulls back
that's cheating
smiles
but leans back in for a second kiss
pauses okay so maybe I do owe you a push on the swings

5:12pm
now THAT is all i wanted
this is just extra.

5:13pm
I smile and push you onto the sing
you are such a jerk
swing*

Ways to pass the time: #6

Play what if games :D

#84

I love the burn of mouthwash

#83

I hate being home alone

#82

I Love PDA because I feel like its proves you love me and you aren't ashamed of me.

#81

I talked myself out of following my dreams. It took 27 other people to talk me back into it.

Tips for a relationship: #13

Don't be afraid to play around, however that may look to you.

#80

I always wanted to tee-pee a house.

:O wow

Today, I went out to my fag's ♥ ( I saw this is with love, duh) house. I realized tons of things, but I am okay with just listing three (lol). Thing number one I was okay with going to some one's house I have never been to,I usually hate doing this. Two, I wasn't nervous or jittery about going and being around people. Three, I wasn't trying or pretending to be anyone but me, this of course resulted in me being relaxed and honest lol. Even though I am sure everyone would have been fine without me dancing to the spice girls. ♥ Life is good. (By the way, if you didn't get it, today was so much fun.)